If I don’t blog soon, I’ll burst

So! Many! Bloggable! Moments!! And no time to blog them all. Oh, it’s like bloggy constipation, and if I don’t get it out soon, I’m quite sure my head will explode.

Here are things that I’d dearly love to blog about if only I had the time. And trust me, in my head, they’re all most excellent posts.

  1. Last Friday, Tristan turned six. SIX! My beautiful baby boy, my first-born son, is six. And I will write him a proper birthday post one of these days, I swear I will.
  2. On Saturday morning, we woke up to the sounds of Simon barfing. Of course. Stomach bugs and birthday parties just seem to go together, don’t they?
  3. Also on Saturday, the snow came fast and furious. Oh my sweet lord, the snow. We’ve had 86 cm of snow (that’s somewhere around 20 inches, I think) in the past week, including a spectacular dump of 56 cm on the weekend. I’ve never seen so much snow at one time. And to make it even more spectacular, we’ve added it to a near-record four METRES of snow that’s already fallen this winter. That’s more than 13 feet of snow, people.

    This was my house on Sunday morning:

    Way too much snow

    Those snow banks on the side of the driveway are about as tall as me. I had to use the shovel as a catapult to heave the snow up higher than my head with every. single. shovelful. Oh, my aching shoulders! Really, I’ve never seen anything remotely like it.

  4. And what else was Sunday? After two hours of shovelling (after Beloved had shovelled for an hour the night before, and I had shovelled for an hour the day before), you might ask? Why, it was Tristan’s sixth birthday party!

    Tristan is SIX!

    Even though half the guests couldn’t make it because of the storm (the sidestreets were impassable until late in the day Sunday and even the parking lot of the party place — Starr Gymnastics, and I can’t say enough nice things about them — wasn’t plowed until half way through the party) Tristan still had a wonderful time, which is good enough for me.

  5. Unfortunately, my brother and his family were trying to make the trek up from Toronto on the weekend, in the midst of the blizzard of the decade. They wisely waited an extra day until the snow stopped falling, but it still took them more than eight hours to make what’s normally a five hour drive on Sunday…. missing the party entirely, unfortunately.

    The good part is that we had all day together on Monday to enjoy Ottawa’s gorgeous Children’s Museum which also deserves a post of its own, but this photo of cousins Brooke (age 14 months) and Simon will have to surmise a fun afternoon.

    Brooke and Simon

    You have to be just a little bit crazy to visit the children’s museum on the first day of March Break, I think, but it was surprisingly easy to get around and have fun despite the crowds.

I’d love to blog it all in detail, but I have another weigh-in this morning with the midwife (Lucas is doing well, gaining slowly but steadily) and Tristan now has the barfy virus. Thank you, supreme ruler of the universe, for heeding my “Please, just not on Sunday!” plea on that one.

Thanks to all for your comments and e-mails wondering how we’re doing. The answer is crazy, but in a good way. If you could find someone to either do my endless piles of laundry, or blog what’s in my head, or both, I’d be most grateful!!

Back on track – I think

Okay, I think we’re back on track (touch wood) with the feeding thing. As of Sunday, Lucas was back up to 10 lbs even, which means he gained four ounces in four days. Not stellar, but certainly an improvement over the nothing of the previous week, and it brings him within spitting up distance of his birthweight of 10 lbs 1 oz. I suspect at my appointment this morning, we’ll see him hurdle over that milestone, too.

To what do we attribute our newfound success? All the latching techniques in the world don’t make up for a good prescription for zantac when baby is suffering from gastroesophageal reflux disease (GERD). Lucas had been spitting up a lot since birth, but in the week he didn’t gain any weight and the few days when I ramped up the feeding efforts, I could see that he was spitting up way too much — both in the quantity and the frequency categories. There were times he would spit up five, six, even eight times after a feed, and sometimes enough to soak through two layers of blankets and a sleeper. Not your average newborn spit-up, and there is nothing more heartbreaking than keeping baby latched on for an extra 10 or 15 minutes in the middle of the night to cram in a few precious ounces and then see it come spewing back out again two minutes after you pull him off the breast. That, and he’d been incredibly fussy in the evenings, crying inconsolably and arching his back, obviously in pain or at least uncomfortable. When I told the ped this on Friday, he prescribed a zantac equivalent. Both Tristan and Simon were also diagnosed with reflux around four or five months, although they were both old enough to take it with food, as opposed to the drops Lucas is getting.

It has made all the difference. I don’t have to change his sleeper four times a day because he has soaked through the bib AND sleeper with his spit-up…. some feeds, he doesn’t spit at all, much to my delight. The evening fussiness has been toned down, if not eliminated entirely. (Anybody care to offer insight into colic? I’m beginning to wonder, and I’ve never dealt with it before.) And the best indicator of success is of course those four ounces he gained over the weekend.

Once again, I have to declare my love for our ped, who read the letter from the midwives with their concerns about the weight gain and listened to everything I’d been doing through the week and everything I’d talked to the midwives and lactation consultant about, then reassured me that he thought Lucas was doing fine, and opined that in a year we’ll have forgotten all about this. And it seems he was right (again with the touch wood.) Reflux does seem to have been the main problem, although the improvements to the latch and extra feedings have certainly helped.

So far, so good. And the great irony is that now that I don’t have to set the alarm to wake him up every three hours (not fun, not for him and not for me!) the baby who would formerly sleep up to five hours at a stretch now wakes every three hours — sometimes every two hours! — on his own and asks to be fed. Sigh.

Filed under, “it seemed like a good idea at the time”

The boys laughed uproariously when we watched a preview of Mr Bean’s Holiday at the theatre, so Beloved thought it would be a good Sunday-afternoon family movie to rent. It’s Mr Bean; how could it be anything but harmless, if not a little silly?

And now, ten reasons why you might not want to watch a Mr Bean movie with your four year old, according to Simon.

“Daddy, why is Mr Bean making that face?”

“Daddy, what is Mr Bean doing?”

“Daddy, why is Mr Bean eating that bug?”

“Daddy, why is Mr Bean getting on that train?”

“Daddy, why is Mr Bean angry?”

“Daddy, why is Mr Bean putting on a wig?”

“Daddy, what is Mr Bean doing with that boy?”

“Daddy, what is Mr Bean doing to that phone?”

“Daddy, why did Mr Bean leave his suitcase on the train?”

“Daddy, where are you going? Aren’t you going to watch Mr Bean anymore? Daddy???”

Day 18 is the new Day 3

Remember how Day 3 was supposed to be the bad day? The day when postpartum emotions and the physical toll of childbirth and caring for a newborn come crashing down on your head leaving you a weeping, exhausted mess? Day 3’s got nothing on Day 18.

We’d hit a bit of a rough patch the last couple of days that culminated yesterday. I’d been sick (wickedly painful constipation and a head cold, followed by hemmerhoids, followed by the trots, accompanied by a chest cold, with a migraine chaser over the course of a week), the boys had been sick (Tristan has spiked not one but two fevers since Lucas was born, and Simon has had a juicy chest cough for a week), and the nanny has been either sick or absent for all or a part of the last five days. Lucas went through a couple of painfully gassy phases, one in particular on Monday night that left the poor child crying for three hours solid. By dinnertime yesterday, I was bawling my eyes out as I stuffed a frozen meat pie and french fries into the oven for dinner. And you know what finally did me in? The idea that I was not taking good care of Tristan and Simon. I’d been snappish all afternoon, and just couldn’t take any more. I bawled simply because I was overwhelmed and felt terribly guilty for not being a good mother to anyone. It was messy, to say the least.

The good news is, the bawling was the nadir, and after a good cry I did feel better. Darling Lucas slept a couple of good stretches last night, and I was ready to face the world again today. The headache was gone, the croak in my throat only a minor irritation, and I thought we were back in the game. I had planned to stop by the midwives’ office for a quick weigh-in to check our progress from last week, and then head out to make up the birthday lunch I was supposed to have with my Mom on Monday but that I had to cancel when the nanny called in sick.

The bad news is, Lucas didn’t gain any weight last week. At all. He’s still the same 9 lbs 12 oz he was last Wednesday. Babies are supposed to regain their birthweight by the time they’re three weeks old, and he’s still four ounces short with his three-week birthday in two days.

So, instead of a 10-minute weigh-in, I once again missed lunch with my Mom because we had an hour and a half visit with the midwife, where we ironed out a plan. I’ve got a call in to see a Lactation Consultant, which is fine but expensive. I have to feed him every three hours round the clock, on both sides, instead of just one one-side-per-feed pattern I’ve been following. This also means, unfortunately, that I have to set my alarm to wake us both every three hours through the night, and I don’t know which of the two of us will be more irritated by this plan. I have to keep stimulating him during a feed, because I suspect he’s getting satisfied from the foremilk and slacking off into sipping and snoozing during the fatty hindmilk phase of the feed.

Because he gained nothing, the midwives have to consult with a pediatrician to make sure there is nothing medically preventing him from gaining, so it’s a good thing I’ve already touched base with mine. We have an appointment scheduled for Friday, where hopefully we’ll see at least a couple of ounces of gain, otherwise we’ll have to start a major feeding intervention by renting an electric pump and supplementing that way. If that doesn’t work, we may have to consider formula supplementing, too. And he’ll have to be reweighed on Sunday and every two days until he regains his birthweight at least.

Sigh.

Lucas is otherwise perfectly healthy, and I’m gobsmacked that he didn’t gain so much as an ounce, because I’m an experienced mother and I can see we’re doing all the right things. Lots of wet and soiled diapers, I can hear him swallowing, I can feel him draining the breast. Aside from the fact that he’s a horrendous spitter-upper (as were his brothers) and a couple of incidents of obvious gas pain, everything seems perfect.

Frankly, it’s deja vu all over again, because I went through a lot of this with Tristan. I dunno, maybe I just make crappy milk — or maybe it takes a while for me to ramp up production. With Tristan, I could blame the poor latch and lack of experience. This time, I just don’t know. It’s kind of ironic that Lucas so physically resembles Tristan as a baby, since he’s now showing the same weight-gain issues. Starving Simon, who demanded to be fed every two hours for the first — well, he STILL demands to be fed every two hours, but now it’s pogos and guacamole instead of breastmilk, never had any weight gain issues as a newborn.

So my job for the next couple of days at least is to exclusively concentrate on feeding this baby and try not to hate my breasts all over again. I swear to god, they’ve truly been my nemesis since I was twelve years old, and continue to vex me all these years later. At least they don’t really hurt anymore, because I can see we’re going to be doing a whole hell of a lot of latching over the next couple of days.

Long, leggy Lucas and his freakish flappy feet

Funny that in the comments on my penultimate post, both Snackmommy and KarynB said they want to see some pix of Lucas’ baby fat rolls, because I was already planning to post a few pix to show y’all exactly what a 10 lbs 1 oz baby (now a svelte 9 lbs 12 1/4 oz, as of his appointment last week) looks like. You’d think he’d be like Simon was (at 10 lbs), chubby and corpulent with rings and rolls of baby fat all over him. You’d be wrong. Take a look at these chicken legs!

Chicken legs

Here’s another one, cuz he was too squiggley to get a good picture:

Just take the picture already, Mom!

I don’t know where he’s keeping all the weight, but I suspect his bones may well be the source of the elusive “dark matter” that counterbalances the universe. His legs are so long that he’s already too long for the 3-mos size sleepers, and his ginormous flipper feet keep getting stuck in the legs of the sleepers. His feet are so big that even the 12-mos size socks keep sliding off. Here he is wearing a pair of newborn socks — note the heel right about where the arch in his foot is!

Sasquatch

Truth be told, his weight must come from his sheer length. I brought him in for his first visit to our pediatrician last week, and had to laugh at his nurse’s reaction when she measured Lucas’ length. Keep in mind, our pediatrician (I’ve blogged before about how much I like him) is one of the more popular and busy peds here, and the day I was there he was seeing three newborns — I can only imagine how many new babies cruise through that office in the average week. Dozens in a month, I’m sure. All that to say, it made it even funnier when Judy the nurse went to measure Lucas’ length and did a classic double-take then laughed out loud. “He can’t possibly be 24 and a quarter inches long,” she laughed as she remeasured him. “He’s the longest one we’ve ever had!”

Barrhaven’s biggest baby — that’s my Lucas! (Okay, so Barrhaven’s busiest ped’s biggest baby — but that just doesn’t flow quite so well.)

He’s a tad on the slow side regaining his birth weight, but not enough to be concerned about yet. The ped confirmed that he’s “borderline” tongue-tied, and we may consider getting his frenulum clipped. I’ve read everything from “this is cruel and unnecessary” (Sick Kids says it won’t do it under any circumstances before age one) to “this is vital to a good latch, decent feeding and essential weight gain.” The nursing is much better than it was – my nipples are no longer cracked or bleeding – but still painful. We’ll give it to his next visit to the ped on Friday to decide, I think. Each day is better, though, so I’m leaning toward leaving it be — like circumcision, it comes down to the fact that I just can’t bear to cause him any discomfort that’s not absolutely necessary, and the latch seems to improve day by day. As long as his weight gain is okay – and right now, it’s just on the low side of acceptable at this point – I am tempted to just let it be.

A 10+ lbs baby with no fat rolls — how about that?

In which my four year old observes the wonders of human anatomy

I was walking around the house after my shower without my shirt or bra on, giving my poor beleagured bits some fresh air to help them heal. (It’s getting better, but still not great. Lucas is spitting up a bit of my blood when he nurses on one side, which has happened with all three boys and yet never fails to completely freak me out, but I also think it’s less painful and that his latch is improving.)

Simon, who has seen me naked plenty of times, took a long look at me and said something I didn’t quite catch. I asked him to say it again and he said, brightly, “Double!” I was just puzzling over what he meant, as he was obviously looking at my chest, when he asked with a tone of amazed curiousity, “Baby can eat from TWO sides?”

Yes, the human body is an amazing machine indeed.

In which the player to be named later is named

I’ve told the story here before about how when Tristan was born almost six years ago, although we knew his first name from the time we found out we were having a boy, we had some trouble deciding on what to do for a surname. Beloved and I couldn’t leave the hospital until we completed his health card application, and of course his health card application needed a surname. In the end, we hyphenated our surnames.

This time, when we left the hospital we left behind a health card application that showed the same hyphenated last name that he’ll share with Tristan and Simon, but in the space designated for his first name, we simply put “Baby Boy.” We had a name in mind, had been 60 to 80% settled on it for months, but we just weren’t sure. And for the longest time, we had absolutely no idea about a middle name.

About two weeks ago, we decided on a middle name, and then toyed with that as a first name for a while. Then, yesterday morning when Beloved came to rescue us from the hospital and bring us home, he reintroduced a name we had been toying with a few months ago and I found myself caught between two names I liked very much. We went from no name to too many names!

So we spent the first 40 hours or so calling him Baby and Baby Brother and Little One, and testing out all the name combinations we could think of. After spending the first night in the hospital trying out one and the first night at home trying out the other, we’ve finally (oh how I hope it’s FINALLY) come to a decision. My apologies, Nancy, because he was very nearly Benjamin. I love love love the name Ben, and it’s only the fact that we have a recently deceased and wickedly mean cat named Ben (who really never did stop hating me in the 10 years we lived together) that made us finally decide against the name Ben.

And so, with no further ado (and hopefully, no further changes of heart!) I am actually tearing up just a little bit as I introduce to you the Player Now Named:

Lucas Sawyer

Lucas Sawyer


(And he already has his own photo album on Flickr!)

Simon is four years old today!

My dearest Simon,

Happy Birthday, my sweet sunny boy. I can hardly believe you are four years old already! I completed the paperwork this week to enroll you in school this coming September, and could hardly believe that you are old enough — and yet, I know you’ve been ready for this for months.

DSC_0476

You are, in my humble and unbiased opinion, plenty clever for a four year old. You can recognize your name and many of the letters of the alphabet, and you can count to 29. You have cute linguistic quirks that I secretly hope you never grow out of, including still saying “lellow” despite being clearly able to pronounce the letter Y in other contexts, and you tend to say, “What you said?” instead of a more polite “Pardon me?”, something I know I should correct but can’t bring myself to do.

At four, you know what you like: guacamole roll-ups; “pink meat” sandwiches with mustard on the side; chocolate milk; superheros; Star Wars; video games like Cars and Star Wars Complete Saga and the games on the Nick Jr website. You like salty better than sweet, and love to dip your food (and your fingers) in tzatziki, ketchup, mustard, or just about anything else. You like dogs, Curious George, Pixar movies, Tom and Jerry, Robert Munsch books and the stories about Matthew’s Midnight Adventures.

DSC_0477

You are a lover, I can see that clearly. When your brother recently tried to get a rise out of you by taunting “Simon likes giiiiiirrrrlllsss!” in a sing-song voice, you simply agreed, saying, “Of course I like girls. I like all of them in the universe.” Your best friend at nursery school is Laila, sometimes called Lulu, but you seem to get along well with just about everyone. I can clearly see that your true best friend is your brother – when he is not your mortal enemy. I love the relationship the two of you share.

You have an uncanny memory, and have recently surprised me by reminding me of incidents that happened while you were sitting in your high chair — at least two or two and a half years ago. You consistently beat us at memory games, and love to play board games of any type. I also suspect you are musically inclined, and you love to paint pictures at your school and bring them home dedicated to the various members of your family.

DSC_0473

You love your pyjamas, and would happily stay in them all day if we let you. For the most part, you’d prefer to stay inside than go out, and you are content to stay home with Daddy while your brother and I venture out for walks with the dog or on other adventures that include physical exertion.

You start almost every single day by crawling into bed with me, and despite my exhortations to be quiet, you define being quiet as singing to yourself, or reciting long passages from your favourite books and movies in a whisper that I can’t help but eavesdrop on. You love to give kisses. I honestly couldn’t count the number of kisses you have given me over the past few weeks as we wait together for your baby brother to arrive. You started life as a jealous and possessive little fellow, wanting to be held constantly and begrudging my attention to any other child, so I worried a little bit when I first became pregnant again how you might deal with the arrival of a new sibling. You have eased those fears down to nothing over the past nine months, and were even willing to share your birthday with your new baby brother if it came down to that. It now looks increasingly unlikely that you’ll have to do that, but I’m still thrilled with how genuinely excited you are about the pending arrival of your baby brother and your delight about being the older brother for a change.

I love you, Simon, more and more every day! Happy birthday, my sweet boy!

(the pictures in this post all came from my visit to Simon’s nursery school earlier this week)

Simon’s party

Phew! For nine months, I’ve been worried that the Player to be Named Later would arrive just in time to disrupt Simon’s birthday party. That’s not to say he might not still arrive on his due date to share Simon’s actual birthday, but at least we made it through the party uninterrupted!

We kept things small, easy and, quite frankly, easy to cancel or reschedule! We invited only family or friends so close they may as well be family. We met at a local indoor playground and let the kids play out some energy before inviting them back to our place for cake and prezzies.

Simon and Amelia
Simon charmed the grown-ups by taking quite seriously my admonition to take care of his friend Amelia, and held her hand the first 10 minutes we were there.

Coffee and chat
It’s great to finally have the kids at an age where the grown-ups can relax and chat while the kidlets play.

'Just what I wanted!'
Star Wars Lego was a big hit! Just as I was snapping this photo, Simon was exclaiming his delight and gratitude to Granny and Papa Lou for “just what I wanted!!!”

Simon's superhero cake

It was a great birthday, full of fun for the kids and low-key and laid back for the adults. I couldn’t have asked for anything more, and Simon was delighted.