I think I’m an inherently lazy person. Given the choice between action and inaction, I’ll often default to inaction. It’s just easier! Not that I don’t get things done when I have to, but in general I’d rather be understimulated than overstimulated and have lots of leisure time rather than having activities scheduled back to back to back all day long.
So you’d think that mothering a newborn, with all its sitting around doing not much except holding the baby would appeal to me. In fact, it’s driving me batshit! I’m good for one solid activity per day, and I have no idea what happens to the rest of the day. How the laundry remains unfolded for three days is a mystery, and the question of when the floor was last washed perhaps remains best unexamined. The post with Lucas’ birth story is stuck at six paragraphs, which if you know my long-winded style at all barely covers the drive to the hospital.
Yesterday my activity-du-jour was the payroll forms for the nanny’s taxes (itself a bit of a bureaucratic nightmare — you’d think after nearly 20 years with the tax department I’d find the forms and processes a little bit less intimidating!) and the day before that it was an expedition to Service Canada to complete the paperwork for my maternity benefits. (We’re actually drowning in paperwork right now, between registering Lucas’ birth and registering Simon for junior kindergarten and tax time and getting my maternity leave in order.) If there’s an appointment, the day is a write-off. Same for a trip to the grocery store. One activity is all I’m good for, and the rest of the day passes in a blur of baby wanting to be held, baby being fed, baby being changed, and loads of laundry being done (oh my sweet lord, the crushing amounts of laundry) but not folded. And then there are the two other patient, sweet and understanding boys who occasionally demand if not equal time, at least the occasional game of Uno or Candyland as recompense for continuing good behaviour.
I know I should look at all this as valuable nurturing time — not to mention an excellent chance to catch up on the rewatching of all my favourite movies on DVD while Lucas either nurses or snoozes contentedly in my arms — but I can’t help but get agitated over all the things that aren’t getting done. Like blogging. Or blog reading. (I’m actually afraid to look at my bloglines account right now!) Or Scrabulous on Facebook. Oh, and you know, dinner and housekeeping and personal hygiene and stuff. Yeah, of course I meant to put those first.
I think the third child is especially challenging this way. I’ve gotten pretty good at the multi-tasking required to keep a household of four running smoothly, and while I enjoyed the respite that came with being ridiculously pregnant and unable to do much for myself except waddle around the house and take care of things I could reach without bending over, now it feels like I’m supposed to step up and get back to business again. Except there’s this absolutely adorable and engaging little guy who sucks up even more of my time (gasp! it’s true!) than the Internet ever did.
Meh. I guess checking only one thing per day off the to-do list is not too bad. I’m just afraid that I might get used to it!
Edited to add: Ha! It’s like she was reading my mind. This may explain things. From Lee’s Doodles today:
Doodle by Lee. The code for this doodle and other doodles you can use on your blog can be found at Doodles.