What we have here is an ex-iPod

by DaniGirl on October 26, 2007 · 25 comments

in Life, the Universe and Everything

This week, my iPod died. Well, it didn’t so much die as drown. Or maybe it was the laundry soap that killed it. Might have, now that I think about it, been the spin cycle that finally sent it back to the big Apple in the sky.

Yes, it’s true. I feel great shame. I laundered my iPod. And now it’s dead.

Well, that’s not exactly true. It wasn’t me who laundered the iPod, it was Beloved. It was, however, me who put said iPod in the bib pocket of my overalls, and me who forgot it was there, and me who dumped said overalls into the laundry hamper, and then transferred them into a laundry basket. But it was Beloved who ultimately laundered the iPod. Somehow that matters.

Beloved found the sparkling clean iPod resting in the bottom of the washing machine, so at least it was spared the circuit-melting indignity of the dryer. With comingling shame and trepidation, I scoured the Interwebs for information about recently laundered iPods. After all, there has been no shortage of information about the other things I’ve unbeknowingly laundered, like lipstick. And chapstick. And a small fortune in coins and bills, which seem to be a lot hardier than lipstick, or chapsticks. Or iPods.

However, not unsurprisingly, I’m far from the first to commit this sin, and following the example of those who laundered before me, for five days I left the hapless iPod untouched on a shelf to thoroughly dry out and recover from its adventure in washing machine land.

Yesterday, it was time to face the music – or lack thereof. With great hope and fingers crossed, I pressed the clickwheel — and nothing happened. I pressed it once or twice more for good measure, and nothing continued to happen. So I plugged it into the USB port and hoped the laptop might resuscitate the poor thing, remembering something someone said about their iPod surviving a laundry cycle but losing its battery charge.

Nothing.

In the words of Apple, my iPod failed to mount. (It sounds kind of salacious, doesn’t it? Poor flaccid thing.)

What we have here is an ex-iPod. It’s not resting, not tired and shagged out after a long squawk, not pining for the fjords. This iPod is no more. It has ceased to be. It’s expired and gone to meet its maker. It’s rung down the curtain and joined the choir invisible. It’s bleeding demised. (If you don’t get the implied references in this paragraph, forget about my dead iPod and get yerself over here for a proper education.)

So what do you do with a dead iPod? Or shall I say, yet another dead iPod? Well, first you read the fine print on your product replacement warranty veeeeery carefully, looking for references to the warranty being invalidated by random acts of laundering. And when you call the product replacement info line, and they neglect to ask the cause of the demise of your iPod, you neglect to tell. And when you pack up said iPod to go back to the big Apple in the sky and wait patiently for a replacement to arrive, you swear on all that is holy that you will, by god, learn to check your pockets before you do any more laundry.

Or maybe just give up laundry altogether instead. It’s probably better for everyone that way.


{ 23 comments… read them below or add one }

1 Kellan October 26, 2007 at 8:07 am

So sad – but very funny story. I was hoping you were going to say that it worked, even after all that. I liked the last line – could just give up doing laundry. See ya.

2 Barbara October 26, 2007 at 8:26 am

He who does the laundry at my house is responsible for checking the pockets. (I confine myself to sheets and towels since I don’t launder to Himself’s standards). Now that it is too late, I read that you should take a wet electronic device apart as much as possible and then put it into a container of rice for a couple of days and pray, hold rabbits feet, etc.

3 Anonymous October 26, 2007 at 8:54 am

I second the rice thing and it really works!!! My son dropped his cellphone in a glass of water(don’t ask me how!!!!). It was dead until we revived it in a bag of rice over several days!!! Wouldn’t believe it if I hadn’t witnessed it myself.

4 patois October 26, 2007 at 9:40 am

I’d like to buy into Barbara’s feeling about the responsibility, but as I’m the one doing the laundry at my house, I tell people to check their own pockets because that’s not part of my job description. But I realize I might be in the minority on that stance. No matter, at least a new one is coming to you. Unless they call and ask you point-blank if it had been laundered.

5 kgirl October 26, 2007 at 10:11 am

Did this happen because you downloaded dirty things? heh heh.

6 Suz October 26, 2007 at 10:22 am

Bwhahahaha! And I’m glad that you have some recourse. I just lost mine on a plane. So it’s not a dead iPod, but it is, sadly, dead to me.

7 Veronica October 26, 2007 at 11:11 am

A few good tosses from a toddler accomplish the same thing. I speak from experience.

8 Fryman October 26, 2007 at 11:50 am

D-
Personally, I was looking forward to the ‘What’s the worst thing you’ve ever laundererered question’. I thought for sure it was coming.

That being said, we also unfortunately operate under the mutual laundry system (a myriad of combinations of her or me doing the various stages of the laundry process). I must say my challenge is less wash stage, and more the ever-dangerous drying portion of the program. What, you’ve never thrown your wife’s $250 sweater into the dryer and turned it into a $250 sweater only your cat could wear??? And with all the technology put into lingerie these days, I am consistently and constantly amazed that they can’t engineer them to survive the super spin cycle!!!

PS – Did you yell “Testing! Testing! Testing! This is your after washing alarm call!!”???

9 Renee October 26, 2007 at 1:31 pm

I hate ‘failing to mount’. That sucks.

10 mamatulip October 26, 2007 at 3:28 pm

Dude. I did the same thing a few months ago with my Shuffle. Washed and dried it and it came out squeaky clean but deader than a doornail.

11 hw October 26, 2007 at 4:57 pm

Oh no. My worst nightmare. My kids never clean out their pockets and hence why we haven’t yet bought them the more expensive electronics.

12 b*babbler October 26, 2007 at 7:53 pm

Oh, my heart weeps for your poor iPod. ๐Ÿ™

I know the pain of the washed item. I’ve washed Mr Babbler’s wallet too many times to recall (although, unfortunately, never the horrific Crackberry!)

I was reading your previous entry – I went through six 3rd generation iPods before the finally upgraded me to a new generation video iPod (and none of them were due to dropping/washing/etc). I just seem to have crummy bad luck (including one that they sent me only to find out that the headphone jack didn’t work. Sigh.) Thank goodness for their extended warranty. It’s paid for itself many many times over.

13 Kathryn October 26, 2007 at 8:49 pm

Give up laundering all togther! I’m for that option!

14 TAM October 26, 2007 at 9:35 pm

Love your blog. I found you on blogspot.

15 Shan October 26, 2007 at 10:52 pm

My brother washed his ipod, cell phone and glasses in the same load. The cell phone and glasses survived, the ipod did not.

16 Liz October 26, 2007 at 11:01 pm

RIP IPOD.

17 Nora Bee October 26, 2007 at 11:40 pm

Oh no! I’ve put off getting one (now am holding out for iPhone) partly because I know I would wash it or flush it or something…my condolences ๐Ÿ™‚

18 karen meg October 27, 2007 at 8:49 am

Poor ipod.
Our last laundry debacle was when I washed my husband’s passport years ago, this happened just before we were going to Europe, but this was about 10 years ago before 9/11. We were still held up at the airport in Spain. Who puts their passport in their pants pocket anyway?

19 suze October 28, 2007 at 1:29 pm

Poor dearly departed iPod.

But teehee on the failure to mount. Oh, and on the monty python references. Tee hee. I had to click through just to watch anyway. I needed the laugh ๐Ÿ™‚

20 crazymumma October 28, 2007 at 6:14 pm

I hate laundry. I have two loads upstairs that need to be folded.

Go tomorrow, Get yourself a new one.

21 Trixie October 28, 2007 at 8:02 pm

I blame the iPod. It should never have stopped swimming.
(Luff the post. Loave it… Lerve it really)….

22 Jenny F. Scientist October 29, 2007 at 8:41 am

When people launder their cellphones, we soak them in several changes of very-pure distilled water, then let them dry. You might try it… can’t make it any more dead!

23 Fawn October 29, 2007 at 3:01 pm

Oh, it’s not just me! I laundered Michael’s Nano a month or two ago. I felt sick when I discovered it at the bottom of the spinner. Not know you were supposed to dry it out first, we tried it right away. It works, although it does occasionally misbehave now. I don’t think we got a warranty on it because it was a free one for signing up with the local phone company’s high-speed Internet. Good luck getting a replacement!

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