Google as oracle

I have been playing in the referral logs again. (I suppose this is an unintentional segue from my last post on guilty online pleasures.) It continues to amaze me the questions that people ask the Internet.

A lot of the hits I get are on infertility, low morphology, IUI and IVF. Searchers came by this month on “why iui failed” and “why pineapple IVF” (I get a lot of variations on the pineapple-IVF search. I guess that one is still hot in infertility circles.) And some people I suspect have not struggled with infertility have found me, too, via “my wee smells is it pregnancy hormone” and ” im three days late not sure“.

We do have a few pet topics around here, like “striped turtlenecks“. Weight Watchers has usurped me from first place, but I am still the second search return for “weight watcher points for Tim Hortons“, and I’ve had more than one searcher drop by on “industrial strength bras“. And I have to smile every time I see a variation on one of my favourite rants, “why americans say zee“.

I get a lot of book review hits, too. Some of them make me wish I had the Internet when I was writing essays in high school, like “what do you think is the feeling of an ounce of cure by alice munro” or even, “how do you pronounce penelopiad“?

Some stuff I have no answers for. “Where’s the Coronation of Napoleon located?” I’m guessing France, but beyond that I’m not too sure. And I get a whole lot of conspiracy theorists asking a variation on “what mothership theories“… don’t even get me started on the weird types of postcards people want.

Ugh, you know what? This whole post was centred around one search hit I got last week, and now when I key it back into Google to get the search returns – I’m not there! Either someone had a lot more patience than me and searched into the double-digit pages, or the Internet is messing with my head.

Ah well, you’ll have to believe me when I tell you that my favourite hit recently was someone searching for “very very very very very very scary mummy.”

I’m not sure I even want to know!

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