This post was supposed to be a photo-illustrated re-cap of a wonderful walk the boys and I took last weekend to feed the birds and chipmunks at Hog’s Back Falls. But, I have been trying to get Blogger to cough up my images for 36 minutes now, and that’s about the end of my patience. I have tried to upload the photos countless times, but Blogger keeps seizing in mid-upload, or gets all the way to the end and tells me it’s done, but when I come back to my post there continue to be no pictures. Grrrr.
It has been an atrociously long week. A week that found me in tears twice, once in sheer frustration and exhaustion at home with the boys, and once in a spectacular little meltdown in my cubicle witnessed by only one person – but just the kind of person I’d rather not be vulnerable in front of. Aside from choking up watching hurricane coverage and news stories about hurt or missing children, I’m not much of a crier when I’m upset. When I’m happy, I bawl like a baby, but I really hate losing it at work.
I find myself sliding down into that unhappy place I was a few months ago. I have way too much to do, and can’t imagine how I’m going to please even half the people who are expecting things from me. Bosses, clients, children (they belong in the first category), husband, friends… I feel like I’ve let them all down this week because I can only give them a piece of what they expect from me, not all of what they want or deserve. Once again, there is simply not enough of me to go around. I have so many ideas for great things I’d like to write, to create, to try – and I don’t even have enough time to pick up the dog crap in the backyard. I haven’t been to the gym in three weeks. W-w-w-h-h-h-i-i-i-n-n-n-e-e-e….
I truly wish I could describe my week to you here, because the ludicrous hoops I’ve had to jump in the name of bureaucracy are worthy of an epic novel. But, I have this personal rule about not to getting fired, and alienating my colleagues and senior management is probably not such a good idea either. Damn, I guess there is something to be said for anonymity.
I want to erase this whole post and start over, but I’m already almost an hour into this and it’s too late to start over so what the hell.
(o)
I hope you have some time to recuperate this weekend.
And I was trying not to feel like a bad mommy because I can’t let Josie into the back yard because there is so. much. poop.
Maybe the thought of a fun package that is finally winging it your way will cheer you up.
I wish I had included some Pocky in it.
🙁 I’m so sorry. Bureaucracy sucks.
I wish I could say more, but you know how it is. (Hello, kindly censors! I love my job!)
If you need an ear/keyboard, you know where I am. Sort of.
Marlao — Hooray, I can’t wait to check the mail box!!
PS and Andrea – maybe I should have saved this up for a Wednesday whine?
Thanks, friends.
hugs
Dani, I hope a great Fall weekend will brighten your spirits, sometimes you just need to write about it to feel better. I am not far, if you feel like a cup of coffee and an ear to listen.
Anna
Oh.my.goodness. I am so sorry you have had such a rough week. A little consolation: your loved ones won’t hold it against you. I really hope things get squared away for your soon.
Hugs Dani…What you need is a good old fashion belly laugh. Invite some friends over pop open a glass of wine and GO TO IT!
I’d go over but I’m already on my 2nd glass..Not safe to drive!
Hugs
Sharon
Call me a daredevil &/or old fashioned, but I may just use the phone on this one and call you.
xo
You know, the WEdnesday Whine idea is not a bad one. BEcause–you can do all your whining on someone else’s blog, where it’s less likely to come back to haunt you. I find it very therapeutic.
I hope you’re feeling better now that it’s officially teh weekend.