Stalking Stephen King

I was 10 years old when I picked up a copy of Firestarter that my mom left lying on an ottoman. I was fascinated by the story of Charlie McGee, the little girl who could light fires simply by thinking about them, and by the way she was treated as a lab project. I became an instant fan, and went on to read almost all of Stephen Kings books… probably a large part of the reason that I’m almost 38 years old and still prone to being afraid of the dark! But in addition to scaring the pants off me at regular intervals for the past 30 years, I think I’ve also learned a lot about the craft of writing, and of storytelling, from Stephen King. Even after all the novels, I think On Writing remains my favourite of his works, and one of my greatest inspirations as a would-be writer.

So when we were noodling ideas on where to go on our summer vacation and we stumbled on Bar Harbor, and I realized that to get to Bar Harbor we’d have to drive through Bangor, Maine, my fascination with Stephen King helped seal the deal. I was introduced to the idea of Maine through the works of Stephen King: Salem’s Lot, Carrie, Cujo, Pet Semetary, The Tommyknockers, and of course, It. I think It scared me worse than any other book in my life, and it’s actually set in the town of Bangor, masquerading as “Derry.”

I was delighted to find out that the Bangor visitors and convention bureau actually sponsors the Tommyknockers and More Bus Tour of Bangor, a tour of some of the places immortalized in King’s work – and then was crushed to realize we will be missing the first tour of the season by a scant five days.

Reading this article in Maine Today about Stephen King’s Maine, I followed references to Bett’s Bookstore in the heart of Bangor, home of a giant collection of King’s works and memorabilia. I sent a quick e-mail to the owner briefly outlining my fascination with Stephen King, our upcoming vacation and my disappointment at missing the bus tour. He returned my e-mail the same afternoon, saying he’d be glad to give me a copy of the same map they use for the tour if I’d like to stop by the store.

In my ongoing stalking research, I found this Roadside America link with photos and a map to the exact location of Stephen King’s own house, just around the corner from the bookstore. I mean, it’s one thing to take a walking tour of the Barrens *shudder* or to make my way up to the Standpipe, but to actually walk by Stephen King’s house? Way wicked cool!

So, our trip to Maine will be memorable for many, many reasons. There’s a playdate scheduled with an old bloggy friend I can’t wait to meet, and the boys’ first trip to the ocean (and out of the country, for that matter.) There will definitely be my first-ever visit to Target.

But Stephen King? I’ve got shivers just thinking about it.

Thomas the Tank Engine toy recall

A friend at work sent me this link today, and I was positively stunned. RC2, the American makers of the wooden Thomas the Tank Engine and Friends toys, has issued a recall on a number of engines and accessories over fears that the paint on the engines could contain lead.

(!!)

(I shudder to think how many of those trains we have, and how much time the boys spent with them – and yes, they have all been chewed on, drooled over and sucked on.)

I found the actual recall notice on the U.S. Consumer Product Safety Commission Web site, and it has details on exactly which engines and accessories are involved in the recall (seems to be mostly the red ones) and what to do. RC2 Corp has information on its recall page on which trains are recalled and how to return them (including information for Canadians and Americans.)

Talk amongst yourselves

Ugh. Not feeling well today. I’ve been really lucky with my headaches lately, as they are becoming increasingly rare. Unfortunately, right now when I do get one there’s not much to do but pray that the Tylenol works and crawl back into bed.

But now that you’re here, you can’t just wander away. In anticipation of our road trip at the end of the month, tell me the best (or worst, or funniest, or simply most memorable) road trip you ever took. For me, the stupidest one was hitchhiking from London to Sudbury with my boyfriend when I was 17.

Book review: Sweet Ruin

Today, I’m hosting a stop on MotherTalk’s blog book tour for Cathi Hanauer’s Sweet Ruin. (Disclosure: this means I get a free copy of the book and a small honourarium from MotherTalk.)

This was almost a 10-pages-in book review, because coming into the weekend I just wasn’t sure I’d be able to finish it in time for my date on the bloggy book tour today. I have to admit, I was biased against the book as soon as it arrived. With it’s girly pink cover and saucily bared shoulder, this book screamed chick lit to me and I’ve never been able to warm up to chick lit. More accurately, I haven’t actually read any chick-lit, ever. Couldn’t bring myself to peruse Sophie Kinsella, or pick up a Helen Fielding. The closest I’ve come is Janet Evanovich’s Stephanie Plum, and I really don’t think you can call a book about a bounty hunter chick lit, can you?

Anyway, all that to say that I did in fact judge this book by its cover. Even when I started reading it, I found it hard to warm up to the protagonist. Elayna Leopold is a 35-year-old wealthy subarban mother to six-year-old Hazel, and as the book opens she is recovering from a two-year depression following the loss of her newborn son, Oliver. After his death, she finds she and her husband Paul are simply going through the motions of their former life, hollow and bereft. Strike two against this book. When I signed on to the MotherTalk book tour, I didn’t even know I was pregnant, and I almost stopped reading a few times last week just because I didn’t want to think about healthy pregnancies that end in neonatal death. Kind of interferes with my new no-worries attitude, ya know?

But, I kept reading. I’m glad I did. About half way through the book, something hooked me deeply and completely, and I tore through the rest of the pages with breathless curiousity. The story examines Elayna’s slow ascent from depression after the crushing loss of her son, and considers the eternal question of where the wife and mother ends and the woman begins. When she falls in lust for Kevin, the gorgeous 22-year-old artist across the street, she finds herself awakened and invigorated for the first time in years… and can I just take a moment here to say holy hell, does Hanauer ever know how to make a scene sizzle! Her descriptions of the magnetism of lust are evocative and breathtaking – literally.

Even though I never did warm up to Elayna’s complex character – and I admit that a lot of that is simply judgementalism on my part, as I could neither agree with nor understand many of the larger and smaller choices Elayna made – I do appreciate Hanauer’s impressive ability to flesh out a character. By far, the most interesting character in the book is Elayna’s six-year-old daughter Hazel, a red-haired bundle of fiery energy and attitude perched precariously between being mommy’s little girl and a preteen diva.

I found this book both compelling and hard to read. Hanauer is a good storyteller with a keen eye for detail and dialogue, and once the story starts moving it accelerates with the inevitability of a train wreck. You can see it coming, but you can’t look away. But that’s not to say that I didn’t enjoy the ride – I just watched cringing, through splayed fingers, hoping that in the end at least the damage would be minimal. I found myself at times completely wrapped up in the story, my own guilt at hiding upstairs in stolen moments to read a few pages woven seamlessly into Elayna’s guilt at her more dangerous choices. Mommy-guilt has more facets than I ever realized!

In addition to the story itself, this book had a few interesting features that I particularly liked. There were a handful of book club questions at the end, and an interview with the author that you can read on the Simon & Schuster Web site – but if you want to read the book, I’d wait and read them afterwards. It was satisfying to finish the book and then read the additional material with the story fresh in my mind, and I’ve always been interested in process when it comes to writing.

In the end, Sweet Ruin stayed just far enough on the literary side of chick lit to win my approval. While it had its racy and titillating moments, the depth of the characters and the complexity of the relationships was enough to both engage and satisfy me. I’d recommend it as an ideal summer beach book.

What are you reading this summer?

Yay day!

It’s been a few weeks since we’ve celebrated a yay day around here. The sun is shining and it’s two weeks until our Bar Harbor vacation, which are two things worth celebrating all on their own right, but I have more!

My bliss right now comes from the fact that I’ve been able to spend a lot of time with the boys recently, and I think we’re all the better for it. We’re in a phase where they’re generally a lot of fun to be around (when they aren’t bickering like an old married couple, that is!) and I am constantly tickled by their expanding world views.

Kerry and I took the boys to Westfest on the weekend while Beloved attended a weekend-long seminar, and Tristan recounted his encounter with a life-sized Lunar Jim and Clifford the Big Red Dog with some enthusiasm. “But,” Tristan concluded with a worldly sigh, “it wasn’t the real Lunar Jim.”

“How do you know it wasn’t the real Lunar Jim?” I asked.

“Well, Mom, because I looked at his back and it had a big zipper on it.” Remind me not to let him get too close to Santa Clause this Christmas!

Later that day, Tristan also decided he needed to make a craft, but he was quite secretive about what it was. He asked me to cut a large circle out of a piece of paper, and returned a few moments later with what he called a CBC frisbee; sure enough, he had made an impressive approximation on his ‘frisbee’ of the exploding cabbage that is the current CBC logo – freehand, using only the image in his head for reference. Be still my patriotic, mothercorp-loving heart!

Yesterday after a bath, Beloved was helping Simon put on his jammies when Simon observed that his fingers were “fancy”. It took us a minute to figure out he meant they were wrinkled from the tub.

So my joy is simply that I love my boys, and they love me, and with that everything else in life is golden.

Care to share what’s making the sun shine on you today?

The lost post

Some time between midnight and two in the morning, I woke up with a perfectly brilliant idea for a post. I lay awake for a moment, working out the details and crafting the structure. As I stumbled to the bathroom and back to bed, I actually laughed out loud a little bit with delight at the sheer cleverness of it. I pulled the comforter up tight against my chin, making little mnemonic links in my head so I would be able to retrieve at least the kernel of the idea from the foggy recesses of my brain.

So strong was the resonance of that flash of insight that the first thought that traversed the blank expanse of my brain upon waking was one of curiousity. I had an idea, said my sleep-addled brain, a really good idea. Now, where did I put it? And though I spent quite a few minutes sorting through dusty piles of clutter and looking in long-forgotten corners and cupboards in the dark warrens of my brain, it was no use.

There was even one breathtaking moment of near-revelation, when I sensed the impression of the idea standing nearby, waiting for me to quiet my noisy brain long enough to recognize it or follow the breadcrumbs of nearby concepts so the idea could reveal itself to me in all its inspired glory. But no. It’s gone.

Damn. I’m sure it would have been a much better post than this one, too. Any idea what it might have been about?

Six week update

Since I peed on the stick last week, I have only thought about being pregnant 682,465 times. This, I’m sure you will agree, is a remarkable improvement in restraint and shows definite progress in my attempts to curb the more obsessive side of my personality. This new zen attitude thing is really working out for me!

Not only do I continue to become more pregnant each day, but I am becoming less superstitious about talking about it. I like Fridays, because that’s the day I make the leap from the barely pregnant 5w6d to a very far-along and respectable 6w.

I am constantly reassured of my pregnant state in part because every morning I look at the peed-on stick in its place of honour on the lip of the bathroom counter (sidebar: when you are a sentimental and vaguely superstitious pack rat, at what point exactly is it okay to throw away the peed-on stick?) but mostly because the symptoms that have been the hallmarks of my previous pregnancies make themselves more apparent each day. I’m a little more peckish than usual, and my stomach rolls unpleasantly as soon as it detects anything close to hunger. My attention span, not good on the best of days, is practically non-existent.

*looks around*
*blinks*
*notices you waiting*

Oh, sorry about that. What was I saying? Right, pregnancy symptoms. I’m crushed under the weight of a fatigue so big that even Rip Van Winkel’s 20-year nap wouldn’t take the edge off of it, which is nicely complemented by the fact that where I usually sleep like a happy log, my sleep all week has been fitful and punctuated by stretches of insomnia.

The crankiness? Oh, no, that’s not a pregnancy symptom. That’s just me.

Hard though it is to believe, my abdomen is already swelling, too. I suppose being on my fifth (!!)pregnancy and having borne children that were larger than some charted asteroids has weakened my abdominal wall beyond repair. I had barely finished peeing on the stick when my stomach pooched out. All I can say is thank god for drawstring summer pants.

Speaking of size, I guess this pretty much halts the progress of my steady but incremental weight loss. I weigh just a little bit less than I did last summer, and have lost a total of nine pounds since February. I think I’ve gained three since last Wednesday. I think I just gained another one there while I was thinking about it. I’m sure this has nothing to do with the fact that the baby made me eat poutine for lunch yesterday and spicy sausages and perogies for dinner. Willfull little creature, it is. It’s been demanding butter tarts for three days, and only the fact that Farm Boy was sold out of them has prevented me from acquiesing – which, of course, has only intensified the craving. Oops, I think I just added another pound just thinking about it.

I work on the edge of the Byward Market, fer crissake, home of some of the best restaurants, cafés and shops in the city of Ottawa. Surely to god I can find a decent butter tart out there somewhere, right? Oh, and for my American friends: a butter tart is like a personal-sized pecan pie, with or without the pecans, occasionally with raisins or walnuts, but gooey-er and altogether more decadent.

Uh, excuse me. I have a – um, a thing to do. Yes, an important butter tart work-related thing. To get. I mean, to do. Quick, point me in the direction of the nearest bakery, it’s an emergency!

Edited to add: I love my peeps. Kerry and Trixie came back from a coffee break with not one but TWO butter tarts for me. And Beloved called to say he found a box of my favourite pecan butter tarts at the grocery store this morning. Oh, heavenly tarty goodness…

Episode 156 of the daycare saga: the one with the nanny

What’s that, you say? You’re dying for another long, rambly post to update you on the endless saga of our search for quality, affordable child care? Far be it from me to deny you the joy of a post like that.

So. Last time you saw our heroine, she had recently had the rug yanked out from under her by the judgemental and unprofessional caregiver who quit by leaving a note in the mailbox after a mere 14 hours with Tristan and Simon, and she had recommenced the time-consuming and exhausting search for child care. (I’m switching back to first person now. The third-person thing was getting rather tedious.)

In the past two and a half weeks (good gravy, has it only been 2.5 weeks?) I’ve posted four new online classifieds and answered more than twenty of them myself. I’ve called daycare centres and home-care agencies. I’ve called phone numbers from posters taped to the mailbox and the community bulletin board at the grocery store. I’ve handed my business card out to strangers I’ve stopped in the park and at Tristan’s school, after sidling casually up to them and engaging them in conversations that usually go something like, “Hey, great weather we’re having, eh? So, do you know any child care providers with open spaces for a 3 and 5 year old?”

I’ve asked other mothers at my bus stop, asked neighbours over the back fence, and even had an old friend that I ran into in the grocery store – who happens to run her own home daycare – asking around for me. For a relatively shy person, I’ve walked up to a whole hell of a lot of strangers and started talking to them. I have, in short, been working the hell out of the surprisingly solid network of parents, friends, childcare providers and strangers.

Much as I’ve tried to shield them from the conversations going on, the boys are aware that Joanne won’t be their caregiver anymore and neither will Bobbie. Tristan has taken to evaluating every adult as a potential caregiver, and has broken my heart a few times by pulling me aside and whispering, “Can {so and so} be our new caregiver?” He has shown a preference for people with swimming pools, extensive toy collections, and other 5 and 6 year old boys with whom he can play.

We’ve decided to try something new this time around. We’re going with – as I have alluded to recently – a live-out nanny. We interviewed someone last week, and although I really liked her, what we could afford was less than what she was hoping to make. I made her an offer last week, and she came back with a counteroffer a few days ago. After much soul-searching and wringing of hands, I told her we simply couldn’t afford that much, and she came back with a reduced counteroffer, and I simply couldn’t say no again. She hasn’t gotten back to me since I accepted her counteroffer, but I’m starting to relax into the idea that it will all work out.

We’re going to be paying her $382.50 a week, which is more than $100 more a week (ouch!) than we are currently paying. BUT, she has a car and is willing to shuttle Simon back and forth to nursery school three days a week while juggling the same-time pick-up and drop-off of Tristan. It’s a hassle, but gives her three days a week with a two-hour midafternoon break. She has a 9 month-old son of her own, and he’s the sweetest, gurgliest, chubbiest 9 month-old I’ve seen since mine were that age.

Having a nanny is a whole new frontier in paperwork, though. She’s considered an employee and I’m the employer, so I have to register a payroll account and deduct and remit the payroll taxes and workers’ comp premiums and all that stuff. Gah! Good thing I at least know a little bit about this stuff from all the years I worked in the tax centre.

If any of you have any experience or advice about the legalities of hiring a live-out nanny (or “domestic worker” in government parlance) I’d appreciate your insight. I’m drawing up a contract that covers vacation time, stat days, sick time, working hours and the usual. And no, the irony has not escaped me that back in February I balked at half this stuff when looking for a child care provider and now I’m offering more benefits AND more money than I refused back then. But at least she is my employee now and that gives me some control over the conditions of employment – which means at the very least that she can’t take on extra kids without involving me in the decision. I’m a little weirded out by her being in my house with my kids when I’m not there – and potentially when I am, most of all. A new adventure for all of us, I guess.

And the money. Oy. In Canada, you can deduct $7000 per child (younger than 7) against your income for tax purposes. Her annual salary will be just shy of $20K, which is $6K MORE than the annual child care deduction limit – and that’s not even considering the $155 a month for Simon’s nursery school “tuition.” Not to mention the fact that it’s damn near 2/3 of Beloved’s annual salary last year.

We’ve decided to suck it up for this year. It will be tight, but my heart was so set on this nursery school for Simon and I am frankly feeling so burned by the whole child care search that if we have to make due on a tight budget for a year we can. A little over a year from now, Tristan will be in school full time and Simon will start morning JK at public school and we can re-evaluate everything then. And of course, our lives could be changing considerably this February – but I’m not counting any of those chickens just yet.

Stay tuned – you know there’s more to come.

Public Service Announcement – Safe Kids Week

(I wrote this last week and then forgot to post it. While it’s no longer Safe Kids Week, I still think this is important information. Since I wrote it, another three year old child in the city has died by drowning in the family’s above-ground backyard pool.)

***

It’s not often I get a press release that’s worth just pasting verbatim into a post, but I thought this information from Safe Kids Canada was so timely and relevant that I would do just that. I read on the weekend a frightening story about a 22 month old child who is recovering in hospital from a near-drowning at his daycare outside of Ottawa.

Even we had a bit of a close call last week at a friend’s inground pool. Tristan was an arm’s length away from me as I held Simon in my arms with my back to Tristan. He misjudged the slope from the shallow end to the deep end and I turned around to see him flailing and struggling to get his footing back under him and managed to pull him back into the shallow end, sputtering and frightened but safe. Awful things can happen in a heartbeat; please read this and be safe this summer. (It’s long, so I’ve tucked it below the fold. Click on the “more please” button to see the rest of this post.)

Safe Kids Canada – Backgrounder on Drowning

Many serious injuries and deaths among Canadian children are linked to summer activities, especially swimming. In fact, the majority (60 per cent) of drowning incidents occur in the summer.[i]

The Facts:

· According to Safe Kids Canada, drowning is the second leading cause of injury-related death for Canadian children. An estimated 58 children under the age of 14 will drown every year. This is equal to two elementary school classrooms of children.

· Another 140 children will be hospitalized each year as a result of a near-drowning incidents.[ii] Near-drowning can cause brain damage and change a child’s life forever. Children who have nearly drowned can have difficulty learning, remembering, planning and paying attention.

· According to a new poll, 34 per cent of Canadian parents believe that if a child were drowning they would hear splashing, crying and screaming. This is simply not true. Drowning happens quickly and silently – often the child just slips under the water. Their lungs fill with water making it impossible to make any sound.

· During the 10-year period from 1994 to 2003 nearly half of all child drownings and near-drownings in Canada occurred in swimming pools (49 per cent); the remainder were in open bodies of water (37 per cent) such as streams, lakes and ponds; and bathtubs (14 per cent).[iii] Young children can drown in as little as 5 cm (2 inches) of water.

· Quebec and Ontario are the most popular provinces for backyard pools. They lead the country with backyard pool drownings with 47 per cent in Quebec and 37 per cent in Ontario.[iv]

· Children under age five are twice as likely to drown as older children. They are attracted to water but do not know its dangers. Their physical characteristics also put them at risk: a combination of poor balance and top-heavy bodies make them vulnerable to falling in the water.

· 38 per cent of drownings of children under the age of five occur in home pools.[v] Often these drownings occur when an adult is not present, while the child is walking or playing near the water and falls in.

The bottom line – these drowning deaths and injuries are predictable and preventable. Parents and caregivers should use ‘layers of protection’ to keep kids safe when in, on or around water.

Safe Kids Canada: Splash into Safety in 2007

It’s simply not enough to teach your child to swim. Safe Kids Canada strongly recommends using ‘layers of protection’ to keep your child safe when in, on or around water.

Advice for Parents about “Layers of Protection”: Follow these 5 Steps to Water Safety

Step 1: Actively Supervise

42 per cent of all children who drowned in the past 10 years did not have an adult watching them.

When in, on or around water make sure you stay within sight and reach of your child at all times – whether it’s a bathtub, a home pool, a lake, a river, a stream or a pond. This means you have no distractions and you are ready to react – no reading or talking on the phone. Wherever water is present, adults need to be vigilant at all times, not only when children are swimming.

Create a safe water environment inside your home and drain the tub after bathing and avoid using bath seats. Babies can drown when bath seats tip over, or when they slip through the leg openings of the bath seat.

Step 2: Get Trained

Know how to react in an emergency situation. Learn to swim or have an experienced adult swimmer supervise children in, on or around water. Weak swimmers should take swimming lessons, and caregivers should learn First Aid and CPR before assuming the role of supervisor.

Step 3: Create Barriers

Children should not be able to access the water directly from the house or cottage. If there are natural water hazards on your property, fence off an outdoor play space for children to keep them safely away from the water.

Many Canadian municipalities require pools to have three-sided perimeter fencing. Since three-sided fencing uses the house as the fourth side to enclose a pool, it enables children living in the home to easily access the pool from the house. A four-foot high (1.2 m), four-sided fence with a self-closing, self-latching gate provides a proven layer of protection. Research has shown that a four-foot high (1.2 m), four-sided pool fencing is twice as effective in preventing home swimming pool drownings compared to three-sided pool fencing.[vi]

Isolation or four-sided fencing is the only passive prevention strategy that has been shown to significantly reduce drowning in backyard pools.[vii] Research shows a fence that goes around all four sides of the pool could prevent 7 out of 10 drownings in children under five years of age by preventing unsupervised access to the pool.[viii]

Whether you have children or not, if you have an in-ground or above-ground pool you should install a four-foot high (1.2 m), four-sided fence with a self closing, self-latching gate. Pool fences and gates should be designed to resist climbing and the gate latch should be installed out of young children’s reach. All these precautions will prevent children from reaching the pool unsupervised.

Even inflatable pools should be fenced off to prevent young children from gaining access directly from the house.[ix]

Other tips: Remember to remove the ladder when you have finished swimming in an above-ground pool. If you are using a wading pool, make sure to empty it when you are done.

Changing four-sided fencing by-laws; what can you do?

Safe Kids Canada is urging Canadians to help enact a municipal by-law requiring a four-foot high (1.2 m), four-sided fence with a self-closing, self-latching gate around all home swimming pools. Not only should in-ground and above-ground pools be fenced, even inflatable pools need four-sided fencing. Pool fences and gates should be designed to stop kids from climbing and the latch should be installed out of a young child’s reach.

Parents who want to find out about their local by-law and advocate for change to the laws in their area, can start by contacting their local councillor. Advice on how to change by-laws is available on the Safe Kids Canada Web site: http://www.safekidscanada.ca/, click on public policy and advocacy, or by calling 1-888-SAFE-TIPS (723-3847).

Step 4: Use Lifejackets

Lifejackets are designed to keep you afloat in water, but they only work if you wear them. Nearly one-tenth of parents believe that children can be left alone while swimming if they are wearing a floatation device such as a lifejacket, arm floats or an inner tube. Arm floats, inner tubes and other inflatable toys should never be used to prevent your child from drowning. Only lifejackets and Personal Floatation Devices (PFDs) are designed for safety. Stay within sight and reach of your child and put young children and weak swimmers in lifejackets when in, on or around water.

Other Tips: Lifejackets and PFDs should be snug; if there is more than three inches (6 cm) between a child’s shoulders and the lifejacket or PFD, it’s too big. Look for the Canadian Coast Guard or Transport Canada approved label on your lifejacket or PFD.

Step 5: Teach Kids To Swim

Evidence shows that swimming ability alone cannot prevent drowning. While parent and tot swimming classes are designed to educate adults in water safety, toddlers are still too young to grasp these concepts. Safe Kids Canada recommends that by age five children are ready to be enrolled in swimming lessons. This is a developmental milestone for children. At this age children have the mental capacity to understand the concepts taught in swimming lessons, as well as increased muscle development and coordination.

Other tips: Teach kids water safety rules. For example, when at the beach or lake only let them swim where you know it is safe.

References:
[i] Safe Kids Canada. Child & Youth Unintentional Injury: 1994 – 2003 10 Years in Review. 2006.
[ii] Ibid.
[iii] Ibid.
[iv] Canadian Red Cross. Drownings and other water-related injuries in Canada. 10 Years of Research. 1991 – 2000.
[v] http://www.redcross.ca/article.asp?id=001037&tid=024 accessed March 19, 2007.
[vi] Stevenson M. Rimajova M, Edgecombe D and Vickery K. Childhood drowning: barriers surrounding private swimming pools. Pediatrics 2003; 111(2):e115-e119.
[vii] Bierens JJLM. Handbook on Drowning. Springer: Germany, 2006. p. 97.
[viii] Safe Kids Canada. Child & Youth Unintentional Injury: 1994 – 2003 10 Years in Review. 2006.
[ix] Sécretariat au loisir et au sport, the Canadian Red Cross (Québec Divison), and the LifeSaving Society. Pertinent Facts about Drownings and Other Water-Related Deaths in Quebec. Undated (1991 – 1991 data).

Book review: Writing Motherhood

It’s my turn to host another stop on a MotherTalk blog tour, this one for Lisa Garrigues’ book, Writing Motherhood: Tapping Into Your Creativity as a Writer and a Mother. (Disclosure: for writing this review, I get a free copy of the book and a small honourarium from MotherTalk.)

The irony is that I have been writing this review for 40 minutes, and I’m only on the second paragraph – not because my words are stuck or any writerly block or lack of inspiration, but because Simon decided he wanted to poop on the potty tonight – which is still an arduous task requiring a team effort – and then laptop seized up, and then dog yakked on the carpet. Writing and mothering are fitful partners. There’s no shortage of material, but often a serious shortage of available time.

Ahem, so where were we? Oh yes. Book review.

In Writing Motherhood, Lisa Garrigues offers tips and inspiration for mothers who want to write but don’t know where or how to begin. She’s an award-winning writer and educator, and each chapter of the book examines a different aspect of writing your “momoir” woven with vignettes from Garrigues’ life. Each chapter ends with a few writing prompts, which Garrigues calls “invitations,” and a select few “inspirations,” salient quotes from writers and mothers. The inspirations I liked, but the invitations less so. Like a few other bloggers who reviewed the book on an earlier leg of the tour for this book, I’m not really a fan of writing prompts. I did, however, tuck a few of them away for blog fodder on a dry day.

The central premise of the book is that you MUST get yourself a notebook of some sort and transform it into a “Mother’s Notebook.” She devotes more than a page of tips to how to select a notebook, and another page to 13 reasons why you should write longhand. And right there, she lost me. Luddite that I may be, I’m still all about the keyboard. I’m so ridiculously out of practice that it’s physically painful for me to write more than a paragraph, and I type at just the right speed to keep up with my lurching brain most days. Personally, I don’t find handwriting to have any intrinsic craft value. The idea of composing or even recording my first impressions without the easy capability to cut, paste and delete with a keystroke and a swipe of the mouse is nothing short of torturous. Writing longhand may be romantic and creative, but it’s also tedious and way too much work. I do carry a small notebook around with me, but even I have a hard time deciphering the half-formed thoughts and scrawled observations.

I found Writing Motherhood to be more spiritual than practical; there wasn’t any moment when I gasped with inspiration and leapt for my quill (or keyboard), but neither did I find myself flipping impatiently through the pages looking for something of relevance. While I enjoyed the anecdotal style, I think I was hoping for something with more discussion on the craft of writing itself, something like Stephen King’s On Writing – a book I found truly inspiring, and one Garrigues obviously also admired, as she refers to it often.

Writing Motherhood, therefore, is a good tool to help you find writerly inspiration from the act of mothering. It reads very much like the sort writing courses that Garrigues teaches, with each chapter examining a different aspect of where mothering and writing might intersect. The end of the book has a great section on resources, with a few books I’d like to pick up from the library for further inspiration. What I would like to see, however, is an expanded section on moving from private musings to published work, and a much larger section on using the Internet to share your work.

Aside from my disagreement with the central premise of the book, it did inspire me to think about myself as a writer. Garrigues loves the idea of a mother’s notebook, but I see the blog serving the very same purpose. I force myself to write every day on blog, and every now and then I try to shake things up with different formats and styles of writing. Like Garrigues’ mother’s notebook, the blog is a place where I record the minutiae that makes life as a mother both delightful and devastatingly difficult, and also a place where I can play with form, style, and voice. I am slowly giving myself permission to consider myself a writer, even though I’ve yet to get the elusive external validation of a byline in the mainstream media.

Oh, and while I didn’t completely forget that I offered up my slightly-used copy of The Big Payoff from my last MotherTalk review, I’m a little late. Congratulations to Myra! I’ll e-mail you for your snail-mail coordinates.