Play along with me. "I would never…."

by DaniGirl on March 26, 2005 · 13 comments

in Uncategorized

Okay, so this is a bit of a lazy blog, but I’m having too much fun in the springtime sun with my boys to come in and write a decent entry.

As promised, here are a dozen lamebrained things I swore I’d never do before I became a parent. Heck, some of this stuff I do daily!

1. I’d never give a baby a pacifier.

2. I’d never tiptoe around the house or whisper because baby is sleeping. (Fact: I nearly throttled the mailman one day because he had the temerity to ring the doorbell during nap time.)

3. I’d never consider cheetos and olives an acceptable dinner.

4. I’d never let naptime schedule my day. (Fact: naptime is the only thing that schedules my day.)

5. I’d never say “because I said so.”

6. I’d never rescue a dropped lollipop from the mall floor, lick the germs off and give it back to my hysterical toddler.

7. I’d never nurse a baby once his teeth grew in. (Fact: he’s almost 14 months and I see no end in sight. Probably soon, but maybe not.)

8. I would never bribe my children with candies or other treats. (Fact: if it weren’t for smarties and jelly beans, nothing would ever get done around here.)

9. I would never give my children snacks in their car seats.

10. I would never speak to my children in that annoying singsong-y voice.

11. I would never use TV as a babysitter.

12. I would never spend $20 on a little wooden train. (Fact: we have at least a dozen of them.)

So those are my confessions. Yours?

{ 13 comments… read them below or add one }

1 SD Kar March 26, 2005 at 9:49 pm

oh boy! How much time do you have? There are so many, one being I would never co-sleep. Another is using the tv for a babysitter (oops). Of course there is the ‘no tiptoe-ing at naptime’ that went out the window REAL fast.
It is so easy to say what you plan to do once you have children but reality is always so much more different.

2 Danigirl March 27, 2005 at 12:30 am

Ooo, co-sleeping – add that to my list, too!
xo Danigirl

3 Kim March 27, 2005 at 2:42 pm

Danigirl, your list was absolutely perfect! šŸ˜† I love it!

4 Snack Mommy March 27, 2005 at 3:39 pm

I would NEVER let my child behave like a monster at an Easter dinner, only to take him in the corner and bribe him with more chocolate so I could have just one more teeny weeny glass of wine.

5 sharbean March 27, 2005 at 4:43 pm

Co-sleep. Give a Soother. Walk around singing songs all day. Play peek-a-boo in public. And, I’m only two months into this parent thing…

6 Jen March 28, 2005 at 1:04 am

I swore I’d never be one of those parents to happily accept a handful of masticated food – let alone offer praise when said food is given to me instead of tossed to the floor.

7 Robin March 28, 2005 at 1:47 pm

Miss Dani,
I have one more for you to add to your list. And I can’t believe you forgot this one since it just happened on Sat. šŸ™‚
I will never lick my finger or napkin and wipe my childs face. šŸ™‚
I hated to out you. But, it had to be done. LOL
ps. My list is to long to write down.

8 SilverCreek Mom March 28, 2005 at 2:20 pm

I should be cooking for the work crew that’s here today but i had to come and see what pearls of wisdom you had here. I’m soo Glad I looked. So I see I have equals in the Mommy guilt department!
Here’s mine
1) I would never let a child co sleep in my bed or his…How else would I get a full nights sleep if I didn’t?
2) I would never have a child that pulled a tempertaum in public. YEAH! Like I thought I could CONTROL this one.
3) I would Never have a picky eater, due to the fact that I made all my own baby food! Well Let’s just say HE’s PICKY !( it didn’t work)
3)I would never give my children chocolate before 2 years old…ummmm did this with the oldest but the youngest almost had it in the delievery room.
I could go on but Your list cover all of mine too. LOL!

9 SilverCreek Mom March 28, 2005 at 2:21 pm

OH yeah before I go….Where do you think mine is while I type this? Watching t.v so I can read some BLOGS!

10 Casey March 28, 2005 at 4:45 pm

Here are mine:
1. I would never give a pacifier.
2. I would never be dissatisfied by working outside the home.
3. I would never have a colicky baby because, you know, I could just nurse her and carry her in a sling and she would have nothing to complain about (Where did I read this and why the heck did I buy into it?!)
4. I would never nurse beyond six months (we’re at one year now, also with no end in sight).
5. I would never comfort a toddler with food.

11 alliemom March 28, 2005 at 9:13 pm

1)let my daughter wear the same dress all w/e because she screams when I suggest she wear something else.
2)tell my husband, under threat of death,to not let our daughter fall asleep in the car on the way home from the in-laws at 5:00pm!and…….
4)not brush her hair for a couple of days because it’s due to be washed tonight and she screams less when it’s freshly conditoned!!!
Feel better now after confessing to my sins! LOL

12 Nancy March 29, 2005 at 12:53 am

Never smell the seat of their pants to check which one has pooped…and yes, in public as well. YOu know, the hold them up and smash your face onto their butt…
Oh, and while I have caved to many of the same on your list (#5, 6, 9, 11), I am most PROUD to say that I have yet to lick my thumb or kleenex to wipe the face. I can still remember the smell when my mom did it to me…have managed to hold out…so far.

13 Danigirl March 29, 2005 at 1:45 am

LOL, Robin, I have been righteously busted!
Casey, I love your #3. We were just so naive before, we thought the bad stuff would never happen to us!
I also love that so many of everyone’s responses have to do with food. I’m glad we’re not the only family with serious food issues!
Thank you all for playing along, this has been a lot of fun for such a lazy blog!!!
xo Danigirl

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