{"id":7604,"date":"2012-11-13T14:28:24","date_gmt":"2012-11-13T19:28:24","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/danigirl.ca\/blog\/?p=7604"},"modified":"2016-08-14T13:46:02","modified_gmt":"2016-08-14T18:46:02","slug":"in-which-she-decides-that-maybe-she-doesnt-like-living-in-the-countryside-so-much-after-all","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/danigirl.ca\/blog\/2012\/11\/13\/in-which-she-decides-that-maybe-she-doesnt-like-living-in-the-countryside-so-much-after-all\/","title":{"rendered":"In which she decides that maybe she doesn&#8217;t like living in the countryside so much after all"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><em>Annual leaf rake-up, Bag 1<\/em><\/p>\n<p>What a gorgeous day to be outside. Yanno, I really don&#8217;t mind raking up the leaves. I rarely have an excuse to come out and enjoy the yard this time of year, and it will be a long cold winter. It&#8217;s nice to be able to get out and do a bit of raking. I&#8217;m sure if I break the task down over a couple of days, it won&#8217;t seem like much of a burden. Such a small price to pay for having so many big trees on our property, and great exercise, too! *whistles a happy raking tune*<\/p>\n<p><em>Annual leaf rake-up, Bag 4<\/em><\/p>\n<p>Okay, seriously? Where are all the oak leaves coming from? We don&#8217;t even have an oak tree!!<\/p>\n<p><em>Annual leaf rake-up, Bag 7<\/em><\/p>\n<p>Wow, I&#8217;ve already filled seven bags and I&#8217;ve barely moved out of this corner of the front yard. Maybe I&#8217;d better recruit the boys to give me a hand.<\/p>\n<p><em>Annual leaf rake-up, Bag 6<\/em><\/p>\n<p>&#8220;Boys! Did you just dump that bag so you could jump in the leaf pile?!&#8221;<\/p>\n<p><em>Annual leaf rake-up, Bag 10<\/em><\/p>\n<p>Man, I am going to write a brilliantly witty blog post as soon as I get my hands on the computer. I&#8217;m sure I&#8217;ll be able to remember these great ideas later!<\/p>\n<p><em>Annual leaf rake-up, Bag 11<\/em><\/p>\n<p>What was that brilliantly witty idea I had again?<\/p>\n<p><em>Annual leaf rake-up, Bag 12<\/em><\/p>\n<p>This is exhausting. Maybe I should try the electric leaf-blow\/suck thing my parents brought over.<\/p>\n<p><em>[45 sweaty minutes later, still bag 12] <\/em><\/p>\n<p>Never mind.<\/p>\n<p><em>Annual leaf rake-up, Bag 14<\/em><\/p>\n<p>Note to self: next year, try to cut the lawn at least once in September or October. This is less like raking leaves and more like combing out tangles in places.<\/p>\n<p><em>Annual leaf rake-up, Bag 19<\/em><\/p>\n<p>Dear Mother Nature, why why oh WHY did you think it was a good idea to make the dead birch leaves look SO MUCH like dog poop? Really, was that necessary?<\/p>\n<p><em>Annual leaf rake-up, Bag 23<\/em><\/p>\n<p>I think I&#8217;m starting to lose the feeling in my fingers. Also, I think the squirrels are mocking me.<\/p>\n<p><em>Annual leaf rake-up, Bag 25<\/em><\/p>\n<p>Sweet farking Jebesus, will I never be finished raking these leaves? This is like Sisyphus meets Groundhog Day with leaves&#8230;<\/p>\n<p><em>Annual leaf rake-up, Bag 28<\/em><\/p>\n<p>YOU! Silver maple in the corner! Drop yer goddam leaves already!! I&#8217;m not doing this again next week.<\/p>\n<p><em>Annual leaf rake-up, Bag 30<\/em><\/p>\n<p>You know what I really love? I love it when the half-full bag collapses just when you&#8217;re inserting a gigantic load of leaves and it tips and spills not only what you&#8217;ve got on your rake but the leaves that were already in the bag because I&#8217;ve got nothing else to do except rake and since I&#8217;m raking I would really love to rake the same leaves more than once&#8230;<\/p>\n<p><em>Annual leaf rake-up, Bag 31<\/em><\/p>\n<p>I&#8217;ve now lost all feeling up to my shoulders and can&#8217;t get the taste of pine needles out of my mouth. My hands are contorted, perhaps permanently, into rake-shaped claws. And still, I rake. And rake. And rake.<\/p>\n<p><em>Annual leaf rake-up, Bag 33<\/em><\/p>\n<p>I see you, fancy neighbour with the fancy leaf-sucking tractor. Oh yes, I see you, don&#8217;t think I don&#8217;t, sitting high on your pretty little tractor with your jaunty little hat and NOT RAKING UP YOUR LEAVES AT ALL.<\/p>\n<p><em>Annual leaf rake-up, Bag 36<\/em><\/p>\n<p>Stupid trees. Stupid leafs. Stupid semi-rural stupid countryside. That&#8217;s it, we&#8217;re moving into a condo downtown next week.<\/p>\n<p><em>Annual leaf rake-up, Bag 39<\/em><\/p>\n<p>&#8220;What do you mean &#8216;what am I doing?&#8217; What does it look like I&#8217;m doing? I&#8217;m duct-taping this flashlight to my rake.  It&#8217;s getting too dark to see and I&#8217;m not done yet. I can&#8217;t stop now, there are MORE LEAVES TO RAKE. MUST RAKE LEAVES. WHAT DO YOU MEAN I SHOULD STEP AWAY FROM THE RAKE?!?!?&#8221;<\/p>\n<p><strong>Final tallies for 2012:<\/strong><\/p>\n<p><em>Number of bags filled: 47<br \/>\nNumber of canisters filled (mostly with twigs): 4<br \/>\nNumber of rake-hours invested across the family: 17<br \/>\nNumber of rake-hours invested by me personally: 12<br \/>\nNumber of times I hit myself in the head with a rake: 6<br \/>\nNumber of rakes destroyed: 1<br \/>\nNumber of blisters and bruises on my hands despite wearing garden gloves: 4<br \/>\nNumber of witty blog posts composed in my head while raking: 7<br \/>\nNumber of witty blog posts actually written: I&#8217;ll leaf it to you to decide<\/em><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Annual leaf rake-up, Bag 1 What a gorgeous day to be outside. Yanno, I really don&#8217;t mind raking up the leaves. I rarely have an excuse to come out and enjoy the yard this time of year, and it will be a long cold winter. It&#8217;s nice to be able to get out and do &hellip; <a href=\"https:\/\/danigirl.ca\/blog\/2012\/11\/13\/in-which-she-decides-that-maybe-she-doesnt-like-living-in-the-countryside-so-much-after-all\/\" class=\"more-link\">Continue reading<span class=\"screen-reader-text\"> &#8220;In which she decides that maybe she doesn&#8217;t like living in the countryside so much after all&#8221;<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[109,17,99],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-7604","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-happy-home","category-life-the-universe-and-everything","category-postcards-from-manotick"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/danigirl.ca\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/7604","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/danigirl.ca\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/danigirl.ca\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/danigirl.ca\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/danigirl.ca\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=7604"}],"version-history":[{"count":7,"href":"https:\/\/danigirl.ca\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/7604\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":11994,"href":"https:\/\/danigirl.ca\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/7604\/revisions\/11994"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/danigirl.ca\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=7604"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/danigirl.ca\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=7604"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/danigirl.ca\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=7604"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}