He’s a goer

Uh oh. Cue REM’s “It’s the end of the world as we know it.”

The baby? He’s mobile. We are so farked.

He’s not quite crawling yet, but he knows how to lean over from a sitting position and stretch himself prone. It’s only a matter of days before he pops up on his hands and knees and scoots away. In the interim, though, he’s turned the barrel roll and the 96-point turn into an art form. He also scooches over to the furniture and manages a little baby chin-up, hauling himself up on his knees.

Did I mention we’re farked?

And he’s in that intense stage of baby development where one not only acquires a new skill, but one must practice that new skill at every available opportunity, and during each and every waking moment. I can’t turn my back on him without him making a break for it.

So very farked.

Because there was less than two years between Tristan and Simon, we never really moved out of a state of general baby-proofedness between them. In the intervening four years, our house has become home to every possible choking hazard known to the modern world, most of which are lurking under furniture and tucked in hidden cubbies and corners just waiting for a curious human with an eye-level of approximately eight inches off the ground to happen by.

And hardy-har-har, I thought the Christmas tree would be safe this year…

Author: DaniGirl

Canadian. storyteller, photographer, mom to 3. Professional dilettante.

9 thoughts on “He’s a goer”

  1. Oh, I so totally understand your pain. While our baby was immobile, I was able to tell people that having three wasn’t so bad. Now that she moves around…and opens stuff…and empties stuff…and touches stuff…it is HARD WORK.

    Get out your playpen — you’ll need it. Now that ours is too cranky to amuse herself in the pen while I’m making dinner, I’ve semi-baby-proofed the playroom (we use our dining room as a playroom) by moving all the little-pieces toys to high shelves, and then I used gates to block off that room so she has somewhere safe to roam around when needed. Good luck!

  2. Hehe…I have a six year old whose presents go through a filtering system before being bought….first -will it be safe for my 2 and a half year old…. -second (projecting a few months here) will it be safe for ‘new baby’ who is due to arrive in January, but who will no doubt master putting things in his or her mouth in record breaking time….

    I’ve heard that Magnetics are the bain of some mothers existence….I have a GF who is convinced her son has swallowed a few stray silver magnetic balls….

    Have fun girl!!! (this too shall pass….eventually!!)

  3. Yup, it’s over now. You might as well go get yourself a fence at Home Depot to put around the tree because it will never make it. Actually one of the funniest things my 10 month old would do at Christmas was crawl right past the tree in search of my mom. We were living in her garage which we had just closed in and he would escape and he would literally have to crawl almost under the tree to get through the hole to get to her room but he did and never touched the tree. Goals, gotta have goals.

    And, while I’m here, can I bug you and your readers about joining my contest give aways. There’s some great prizes….

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  4. I can’t remember where I saw it, but someone somewhere recommended handing a toilet paper roll to the older kids and having them use it as a filter for which toys needed to be removed from the baby’s reach — no idea if it works, but we’ll be trying it out when J starts moving (sometime yet … I hope!).

  5. Farked is right. I remember being worried that Leah was a late crawler/walker. In retrospect, it was a blessing.

    It’ll be an interesting Christmas chez Dani this year. Good luck with the babyproofing.

  6. I have a toddler who happens to love checking on everything at home! Indeed there can be a lot of choking hazards lying around at home. I tried to childproof our home step by step as she grew each day. It’s a lot of work but it gave me my peace of mind. Good luck!

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