{"id":8192,"date":"2013-04-28T15:39:55","date_gmt":"2013-04-28T20:39:55","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/danigirl.ca\/blog\/?p=8192"},"modified":"2013-04-28T16:15:41","modified_gmt":"2013-04-28T21:15:41","slug":"operation-get-banned-from-the-kitchen-phase-2","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/danigirl.ca\/blog\/2013\/04\/28\/operation-get-banned-from-the-kitchen-phase-2\/","title":{"rendered":"Operation &#8220;Get Banned from the Kitchen&#8221; &#8211; Phase 2"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><span class=\"drop_cap\">D<\/span>espite my best efforts so far, the family stubbornly refuses to ban me from the kitchen.  One would think that more than a decade of mediocre cooking would at least leave them looking for an alternative, but they seem to show a remarkable tolerance for unremarkable food.<\/p>\n<p>A few weeks ago I played what I thought was my best card by setting the oven on fire. Alas, I fell short once again of my goal.  My family, in fact, barely raised a collective eyebrow, and certainly made no move to banish me from the room at the domestic heart of the house.<\/p>\n<p>Realizing the need for more drastic measures, I have once again attempted to set the oven on fire, this time by strategically dumping a pan full of bacon and grease into the bottom of the oven.  I have nefariously gambled that the combination of safety hazard and waste of a pound of perfectly good bacon will be enough to force the family into action. If nothing else, I have ensured that a residue of bacon grease will remain embedded into the sides of the oven drawer and its collection of baking sheets and muffin tins well into the next decade.<\/p>\n<p>How much more of this torture can they withstand before they are forced to take action and remove me from the kitchen for their own good &#8211; and mine?<\/p>\n<p><strong>Edited to add:<\/strong> And I clearly did an excellent and thorough job scouring all traces of bacon drippings from the stove.<\/p>\n<p><a href=\"http:\/\/www.flickr.com\/photos\/postcardsfromthemothership\/8690722132\/\" title=\"IMG_00000006 by Dani_Girl, on Flickr\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" src=\"http:\/\/farm8.staticflickr.com\/7053\/8690722132_04868cb339_z.jpg\" class=\"frame aligncenter\" width=\"449\" height=\"640\" alt=\"IMG_00000006\"><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Despite my best efforts so far, the family stubbornly refuses to ban me from the kitchen. One would think that more than a decade of mediocre cooking would at least leave them looking for an alternative, but they seem to show a remarkable tolerance for unremarkable food. A few weeks ago I played what I &hellip; <a href=\"http:\/\/danigirl.ca\/blog\/2013\/04\/28\/operation-get-banned-from-the-kitchen-phase-2\/\" class=\"more-link\">Continue reading<span class=\"screen-reader-text\"> &#8220;Operation &#8220;Get Banned from the Kitchen&#8221; &#8211; Phase 2&#8243;<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[95],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-8192","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-feed-me"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/danigirl.ca\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/8192","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/danigirl.ca\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/danigirl.ca\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/danigirl.ca\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/danigirl.ca\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=8192"}],"version-history":[{"count":3,"href":"http:\/\/danigirl.ca\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/8192\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":8197,"href":"http:\/\/danigirl.ca\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/8192\/revisions\/8197"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/danigirl.ca\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=8192"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/danigirl.ca\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=8192"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/danigirl.ca\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=8192"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}