You’re about to lose some respect for me. (If you had any to begin with, that is.) I’m about to confess to something particularly shallow.<\/p>\n
Not only do I watch <\/em>TLC’s What Not to Wear<\/a> on occasion, but I’d love to have someone do that wardrobe makeover thing to me. Not so much with the humiliation on national TV – lord knows there’s more than enough humiliation right here on the Interweb – but I’d really like someone who knows clothes and quality and makeup walk me through the whole style thing. I don’t have a style. Where do you get one, anyway? Can I buy it on eBay? And one day I’d like to spend some serious money on real clothes, instead of collecting separates pell mell like a magpie building a nest.<\/p>\n I keep making the same mistakes over and over again. For example, I have this addiction to striped turtlenecks. I buy at least one every season, each one worn a few times until I catch sight of myself in some passing reflective surface and realize how unflattering a look it is for me. I’m a curvy sort of girl, and stripes are not always kind to curves. And turtlenecks? Let’s just say the push-up effect works better in a bra than it does as a turtleneck supporting my chin(s). I can rationalize this is the cold light of day, but once I get into the mall and see all those long-sleeved striped turtleneck sweaters in the seasons brightest colours I can’t help myself.<\/p>\n I went to Winners the other day, and promised myself I would try on anything except a striped turtleneck. I tried on 12 black sweaters and tops (did I mention I just this year discovered black on black? Where have you been all my life?) and not one of them was worth buying. Last weekend, I was in the mall with the boys and got sucked into Northern Reflections <\/a>(of all places – so much for urban chic at the office) by a conspicuous display of – you guessed it – striped turtlenecks. I bought two. I am incorrigible.<\/p>\n And things are further complicated by the fact that I’ve recently realized that as a 36 year old mother of two, I’m a woman of a certain age. Just how firm is that “no miniskirts after 35” rule? Damn, one of my best features is my legs! How mini is mini? I also have an addiction to plaid skirts cut about four inches above the knee – not Britney Spears don’t-bend-over short, but certainly shorter than the matronly to-the-knee length I’ve been seeing all over town. Please tell me I don’t have to give those up yet!<\/p>\n So there’s the media-savvy part of me that is horrified by shows like What Not to Wear, where you expose your inadequacy on national TV and eat a good helping of humiliation for the edification of the armchair-fashionista potato-chip-snarfing audience at home. But there is a part of me who wants to be Cinderella, to be Julia Roberts in Pretty Woman or Ally Sheedy in the Breakfast Club. Despite the fact that I am mostly a confident, satisfied, happy woman, there’s a marginalized teenager deep in my heart who would love to find out she’s more beautiful and stylish than she ever imagined.<\/p>\n So if you see me in the mall, please do us both a favour and drag me away from the striped turtleneck sweaters that I will inevitably be coveting. I am weak.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" You’re about to lose some respect for me. (If you had any to begin with, that is.) I’m about to confess to something particularly shallow. Not only do I watch TLC’s What Not to Wear on occasion, but I’d love to have someone do that wardrobe makeover thing to me. Not so much with the … Continue reading “What not to wear”<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-276","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/danigirl.ca\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/276","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/danigirl.ca\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/danigirl.ca\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/danigirl.ca\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/danigirl.ca\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=276"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"http:\/\/danigirl.ca\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/276\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/danigirl.ca\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=276"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/danigirl.ca\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=276"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/danigirl.ca\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=276"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}