{"id":1163,"date":"2008-01-22T08:04:34","date_gmt":"2008-01-22T13:04:34","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/danigirl.ca\/blog\/2008\/01\/22\/interminable-intermezzo-or-seven-thoughts-on-the-end-of-pregnancy\/"},"modified":"2008-01-22T08:08:00","modified_gmt":"2008-01-22T13:08:00","slug":"interminable-intermezzo-or-seven-thoughts-on-the-end-of-pregnancy","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/danigirl.ca\/blog\/2008\/01\/22\/interminable-intermezzo-or-seven-thoughts-on-the-end-of-pregnancy\/","title":{"rendered":"Interminable Intermezzo, or, Seven thoughts on the end of pregnancy"},"content":{"rendered":"

Back a couple of weeks ago, Rebecca from Adventures in Mommyhood <\/a>tagged me for the “seven weird things about me” meme. I think the blog is a testament to the fact that there are far more than seven things that are weird about me, so I’m going to twist this one into the new all-uterus-all-the-time format of blog and adapt it to be “seven things about the end of this pregnancy” meme. <\/p>\n

    \n
  1. \n I feel like I’m caught in suspension between two worlds. It’s been almost a week since I’ve been at work, but baby shows no signs of arriving. Theoretically, it could be as long as seventeen or even twenty days (whimper) until baby arrives, but the midwives are now so concerned about his size that they said they won’t make me go much over seven days past my due date. Every twitch and twinge is cause for serious – and ultimately disappointing – analysis. Does anybody else find it terribly ironic that pregnancy is bookended by an obsession with finding, or not finding, some predictive smudge on the toilet paper?<\/li>\n
  2. Further to point one, I have now made it my full-time occupation to entice this baby into leaving my womb. Beloved hasn’t gotten this lucky since the good ole days of trying to get knocked up in the first place, and I’m chugging red raspberry leaf tea like it’s going out of style. I walked loops around Bayshore Shopping Centre for a while yesterday morning, and took the dog for a rather frigid walk around the block after dinner. I swear, I haven’t had this much exercise since the good ole days of trying to get knocked up in the first place!! So far, I have tired feet and an incredibly sore pelvis, and one good contraction to show for my efforts. Bah.<\/li>\n
  3. \n

    I have two emotional channels right now, and I vacillate randomly – and regularly – between them. One is a blissful sense of contentment, where all I can think about is how much I love my boys, how wonderful they are and how great my life is. The other is a deep and dangerously cranky annoyance with the entire universe and its conspiracy to irritate the shit out of me by any and all means possible. Aren’t you glad you aren’t Beloved right about now?<\/li>\n

  4. \nSpeaking of Beloved, he’s an angel. No, really, you have no idea how great he has been during this last stretch of pregnancy. From turning the other cheek again and again in the face of my increasingly irrational hormonal outbursts to taking on the lions share of just about everything around the house to not blinking an eye when I ask him to massage my poor beleaguered tailbone (I can’t help think of Peggy Bundy saying “Rub my toushie!”), he’s been a superhero. <\/li>\n
  5. \nDespite the fact that I’m nearly catatonic with exhaustion, I can’t sleep more than an hour or two at a time during the night. It’s getting so bad that I’ll roll over to look at the clock (itself an effort of Herculean proportions!) and whimper with dismay when I see that it’s still only three or four o’clock in the morning. More than once, I’ve found myself thinking, “Oh my god, is it not even morning YET? Will this night never end?”<\/li>\n
  6. \nI have become a space cadet. I can’t tell you the number of times I find myself, during the course of a day, sitting and staring off into space – often while holding a half-folded sock in my hand, or in the middle of looking for a can of soup in the cupboard. My brain has deserted me entirely.\n<\/li>\n
  7. \nI have three speed settings right now: slow, really slow, and glacially slow. Our phone rings four times before the voice mail kicks in, and more than once I have missed a call because four rings isn’t enough for me to haul myself off the couch and make it the fourteen steps around the end of the couch and into the next room to get to the phone. My new theme song is Mussorgsky’s “The Ox Cart<\/a>” from his Pictures at an Exhibition symphony, which Beloved hums at me regularly. (And yet, I still love him. Go figure.)<\/li>\n<\/ol>\n

    Now if you’ll excuse me, it’s time for my next dose of evening primrose oil and I have to massage the accupressure points on my ankles…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

    Back a couple of weeks ago, Rebecca from Adventures in Mommyhood tagged me for the “seven weird things about me” meme. I think the blog is a testament to the fact that there are far more than seven things that are weird about me, so I’m going to twist this one into the new all-uterus-all-the-time … Continue reading “Interminable Intermezzo, or, Seven thoughts on the end of pregnancy”<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[29],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-1163","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-postcards-from-my-uterus"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/danigirl.ca\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1163","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/danigirl.ca\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/danigirl.ca\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/danigirl.ca\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/danigirl.ca\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=1163"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"http:\/\/danigirl.ca\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1163\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/danigirl.ca\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=1163"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/danigirl.ca\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=1163"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/danigirl.ca\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=1163"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}