{"id":1096,"date":"2007-11-19T08:44:49","date_gmt":"2007-11-19T13:44:49","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/danigirl.ca\/blog\/2007\/11\/19\/two-for-the-price-of-one\/"},"modified":"2007-11-19T08:44:49","modified_gmt":"2007-11-19T13:44:49","slug":"two-for-the-price-of-one","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/danigirl.ca\/blog\/2007\/11\/19\/two-for-the-price-of-one\/","title":{"rendered":"Two for the price of one"},"content":{"rendered":"

We didn’t plan to space Tristan and Simon 22 months apart. In fact, we didn’t really plan <\/em>for Simon at all – not that it wasn’t a blissful surprise<\/a>. But when I think back to those early days, with a newborn and a not-quite-two-year-old in the house, I shake my head and wonder how we all survived with our sanity intact.<\/p>\n

Now, of course, I’m glad they are so close in age. They are best buddies (when they aren’t mortal enemies) and most of the time, we simply treat them as if they were the same age. They have the same bedtime (in beds in the same room), the same routines, the same expectations and the same standards of behaviour. While this probably makes for a bit of a challenge sometimes for Simon, if you were to ask him I’m sure he’d tell you there is nothing his brother can do that he can’t do too, if not better.<\/p>\n

It’s easy to forget, sometimes, that he’s two years younger. They play the same games, enjoy the same activities and watch the same shows and movies. They were both enrolled in swimming lessons at their respective levels during the same time slot, and went to the same day camp together. Right now, they’re even both going to school in the afternoons, Tristan to SK and Simon to his nursery school – which I think gives them a well-needed break from their near-constant companionship.<\/p>\n

Can you see I’ve got a bit of a neurotic thing going on about ensuring equal treatment? One doesn’t usually get something that the other one doesn’t, whether it’s a toy or a treat or an experience. While this wasn’t exactly intentional on my part, it has evolved into a bit of an unwritten rule around the house to the extent that I didn’t enroll Tristan in skating lessons this winter in part because we’ve already got a load on our plates for this year, but also partly because I couldn’t swing it for both of them.<\/p>\n

This equal treatment thing is becoming a little unmanageable as they move out into the big world of socializing, too. Because they have the same friends and enjoy the same activities, they get invited to playdates and parties together… most of the time. Now, though, for the first time, Tristan is being invited to the birthday parties of his classmates – and of course, there is no invitation for Simon. I feel bad for Simon, and while I’ve reassured him that there will come a time when he gets invited to parties that Tristan can’t attend, I’ve also promised him that he and I will do something special together while Tristan is off at these parties.<\/p>\n

What’s more awkward, though, is when family friends have invited Tristan along to an activity without including Simon. I haven’t yet said, “Sure, Tristan would love to come tobogganning \/ to the movies \/ to your house for the afternoon – as would Simon!” because up until now Simon was not quite as independent (read: potty trained!) as his brother. Now that they’re both less needy and have more or less the same abilities, I would like to see them both included – but I have to keep reminding myself that they are two independent creatures and not a package deal.<\/p>\n

It will be interesting to see how the arrival of baby turns the dyad into a triad, especially with four years between Simon and Baby. One thing I know for sure: it’s going to be a lot easier to take care of a newborn without having a needy toddler in the house! <\/p>\n

(Ha! Just as I was about to publish this post, Beloved called me and said, “I think we’re in trouble. I thought we had a few years before they’d be eating like this.” Tristan had just finished his SECOND bowl of oatmeal for breakfast, while Simon was eating a couple of waffles and a bowl of fruit and looking for something else. Yikes!)<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

We didn’t plan to space Tristan and Simon 22 months apart. In fact, we didn’t really plan for Simon at all – not that it wasn’t a blissful surprise. But when I think back to those early days, with a newborn and a not-quite-two-year-old in the house, I shake my head and wonder how we … Continue reading “Two for the price of one”<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[10],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-1096","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-mothering-without-a-licence"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/danigirl.ca\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1096","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/danigirl.ca\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/danigirl.ca\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/danigirl.ca\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/danigirl.ca\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=1096"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"http:\/\/danigirl.ca\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1096\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/danigirl.ca\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=1096"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/danigirl.ca\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=1096"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/danigirl.ca\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=1096"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}