A love letter to Tristan, Age 11

Happy Birthday, my handsome fellow. Today you are ELEVEN!!

Oh Tristan, where to start? You, my big boy, have had a very good year. You seem content and confident, and you are a joy to be around. You love movie nights and game nights with the family, caesar salad with bacon, reading, Minecraft novelty versions of pop songs, Phineas and Ferb, riding your bike, feeding the chicadees and Chinese food, among other things.

You are getting SO tall – I fear this time next year you may be as tall as your old mum! You’re now at the height of my jaw, and I love how you come in to be hugged with your head tucked down so you land under my chin – but I imagine there is a day in the not too distant future when it’s me tucking my head under your chin! As long as there are still hugs, I think I will be okay with that.

You are still my explorer, my adventurer, the one who is always up for a walk or a climb or a bike ride. You are becoming the family’s athlete, and this year you played lunchtime football at school as well as running in the cross-country meet. You’d prefer to walk home from school than be driven, and I know if I am twitching for an adventure, you will be the first one to volunteer to come with me. (You’re also pretty patient with some of my crazier photography-related ideas!)

You’ve fallen in with a good lot of mates at school, and I enjoy having your friends over to the house to play. You are less outgoing than your extroverted middle brother, but you are not shy either. You strike a pleasant middle ground, and the friends you do let in to your inner circle are fast and fierce. Your friends right now are Theodore and Owen and Carter and Ethan and Orion, and of course Sophie. Your ongoing friendship with her is perhaps the sweetest thing I’ve ever seen.

I couldn’t write about you at age 11 without mentioning your current obsession with the game Minecraft. I think you eat, sleep and dream about the game! Watching your ease with the game, and the technology behind it, makes me wonder if you don’t have a future in computers. To our delight, you even built a working app in school this year. You have slightly more old-fashioned career aspirations at this point, though. To my surprise and (I must admit) delight earlier this year, you announced with some conviction that when you grow up you want to be a blacksmith.

Last year we saw a big turnaround mid-year in your attitude toward school and your behaviour in it. This year, you have really hit your stride and your grades reflect your much-improved attitude. You have been invited to test for the gifted program next year, and I think you will enjoy that if you are accepted into the program. You are curious and creative, two skills that will take you far in life. Even though you have honed your athletic side this year, your creative side continues to flourish. You still draw regularly, if not as obsessively as you used to, and you enjoy your guitar lessons with Dave.

You get along well with both Simon and Lucas, which some days means you resist throttling them quite well. You melted my heart a few months ago when I found out that after your dad or I had finished reading to you and Simon at bedtime and tucked you in, you will often read aloud to Simon yourself. You are patient with Lucas as well, and we have even entrusted you with the care of your brothers for very (very!) brief interludes recently.

I enjoy your company, Tristan. I love that you are developing a sense of humour which perfectly complements your dad’s and mine. I love that we can watch movies and even read the same books (like the Hunger Games) and discuss them on an almost grown-up level. I love that I can rely on you and interact with you and share with you in a more sophisticated and grown-up way.

Mostly, I just love you! Happy birthday to you – and to your silly cat, with whom you are delighted to share a birthday. Happiest of birthdays, my sweet Tristan! You are very much loved.